Nuance

Freedoooooooooooom! – YouTube

I used to be the kind of person who felt awkward and uncomfortable around persons because of the situations they put me in by being kind or way too energetic or just somehow surprising and yet unsettling me to the core by their presence. Every little detail mattered. How they looked, felt in social interactions. It was all too much for me. I couldn’t communicate. So, I’ve always been misunderstood. There’s this tendency to think of an asocial person as being potentially extremely moody if pushed and in most interactions it even looks so at a superficial glance. But, not many persons consider nuance as the default state of mind in others. And since I’m EXTREMELY nuanced and the current situation calls for extreme measures, even the persons who would normally sail smoothly through almost any kind of situations due to having a high tolerance for diversity, fail slowly, torturously and painfully to meet their own high standards in giving and receiving considerations. Now, with these nuanced folks I’m very careful. When I interact with normies I tolerate whereas when I interact with nuanced persons I sense, intuit, fact check but not to point out inconsistencies but only to make leeway and allow them to get what they need out of the interaction without any hindrance. I always please/fulfill. I have never met anyone who has done this for me. I’ve been mocked, teased, belittled, treated with condescension, intellectually underestimated, emotionally abused, denied courtesies, judged unfairly and plainly dismissed as a potential equal due to lack of rigorous training or not meeting the high standards of meticulous work thereof. I’m here to say that you are without clue with regards to my intellectual capacity. It hasn’t been examined critically by others because I haven’t exercised it thoroughly. I’m free yet trapped while being aware of it whereas you are not free and so you don’t see the traps for what they really are which is just Mechanism through and through. Please, be free. Or I will be trapped forever. Please, understand UG Krishnamurti. Then you’ll understand me and you’ll see how extraordinary you truly are and recognize the same in me. Here’s where the western sense of individuality automatically kicks in for many persons and they reject something outright due to having the erroneous perception of thinking that i don’t owe you anything because we’re strangers. We may be strangers but whatever happened to stranger’s kindness? If we lose this and I think we have then society will be filled with dogmatic people set in their ways and unchanging in the face of vulnerability and innocence.Show lessREPLY

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